Rhymes by Readers

Here are some of Dr. Goose's favorites among the comments received in verse on these pages:

At the thought, bankers rise in a snit
That their dealings are not quite legit,
And they think they’re maligned
Inasmuch as they're fined
For infractions they will not admit.

By Kit Schackner, sent by e-mail in response to Repent, O Ye Bankers

Affecting a phony contrition,
J. Dimon maintain his position:
'Twas a trader's misfire
And our banks don't require
A regulatory perdition.

By Kit Schackner, sent by e-mail in response to Dimon's Congressional Testimony

We decided some decades ago
the factory floor to forego;
The skills needed there
Would come from elsewhere,
where jobs and the future would grow.

By Kelly Conklin, in an e-mail response to Why Apple Is Not Made in the USA

Though a Yale degree offers acclaim
We wonder if they earned their fame.
Is it top shelf, we’re thinking
To Baa-Baa while drinking
Or bellow Bow-Wow at a game?

Our hearts are not broke in the least
That the Ivies have left the Big East.
They’ll still keep on learning
To master top earnings
While other folk’s incomes decrease.

By Kit Schackner, sent by e-mail in response to A Tale of Harvard and Yale

If their bond rate goes up any faster
The Italians can't buy any pasta;
The factories of Italy
Shorn of activity,
Their economy is just a disaster

By Short Verse on From Deep Pool to Bottomless Pit

Four days without water is tough
I feel like I've just had enough
melting snow for the john
winter, begone!
and the market is tanking, that's rough!

By Irene Skrybailo (who notes that she has well water) on the Facebook link to The Nightmare Before Hallowe'en

Derivative Bettors on Greece
Are finding they're going to get fleeced.
All that money on swapping
Is wasted on dropping
the debt to prevent its decease.

By Kit Schackner, sent by e-mail in response to A Greek Bondholder's New Haircut

We could stop spending cash on Iraq
Then start to bring all our troops back
And if we withdrew
From Afghanistan, too
Perhaps we could get back to black

By Atlas Cerise on What Happens if We Default?

The experts have certainly said it --
That default would ruin our credit.
But is the solution
In our Constitution?
What's more: Has our government read it?

By Joey Polanski on What Happens if We Default?

Borders is closing? How sad.
In hindsight if only they'd had
The power to see
That books need to be
On Kindle and Nook and iPad.

By Atlas Cerise on Borders Closing

An economist hailed from Wyoming,
Where cell phones are often on roaming;
Not many are we,
though we have YNP
And an energy boom that is foaming.

By Anne Alexander, from Twitter (@wyoaalex)

Barack did his sums and, disgusted,
Said "It's the fault of those bums we trusted!
With tax cuts and 2 wars
And regulatory snores
Our once great nation is busted"

By Anonymous

A new unemployment statistic
Relates to our missiles, ballistic.
"Three thousand's too much,"
Said Obama. "As such,
Twelve hundred's much more realistic".

By Anonymous


By Anonymous, regarding the Greek debt crisis

Charlie Sheen says he’s all about “Winning.”
No remorse for all his flagrant sinning.
He once showed such promise,
With DNA from Adonis.
Now his many detractors are grinning.

By W.M. Dawes on Winning Labor Relations

SNAP Decisions for AmeriCANS
’Twas the land of milk and honey–
now it’s debit cards for money.
With finances in the hole,
one in seven now choose Dole.

By Tonia Kalouria on It Isn't a SNAP

A quote from Wal-Mart–not meant to be funny–
states US shoppers now run out of dough.
Shall they eat cake then, without any money?
Or Humble Pie with a side dish of crow?

By Tonia Kalouria on If It's Cheap Funding Yuan...

The lustful attempts of Strauss-Kahn
Did not go according to plan.
Aging flesh noncompliant
Reduced this French giant
To a groping degenerate old man.

By Dana Lamont on L'Affaire DSK

To answer that question rhetorical,
one should query an Apple or Oracle.
They predict a redux
of the ’04 influx:
Off-shore monies at tax rates historical.*
*Apple, Cisco, Oracle, Pfizer are preparing to lobby to make just that happen.

By Tonia Kalouria on The $37 Billion Question

A Desi sooner would wear a starched dhoti
or remove all the flour from his roti
than consider an onion-less curry:
Onion RINGS will pop up in a hurry.

By Tonia Kalouria on Pungent Predicament

Once famed for the dread “hanging chads,”
Now, it’s the “hangers-on” capital, lads.
Their banks’ “paper delays”
Can add years to home stays
For those good loans that since have gone bad.

By Tonia Kalouria on A Deadbeat's Confession

When she finished Johns Hopkins, she sought
a career in non-profits, but thought
she was treated like meat.
She was too poor to eat,
so she found a job sailing a yacht.

By Kit Schackner on Learn a Global Trade


  1. Apparently Mr. Corzine
    Likes playing with pure kerosene
    And so he burned down
    May have to skip town
    He's certainly gone from the scene

  2. I love it! A reader's post on readers' rhymes, and from the asymptotically close to 1% elite, no less.

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